Baking cookies: a holiday tradition and lifestyle.

Baked goods make friends.

Too many cookies? Sharing cookies and surpassing social anxiety

This time last week, I was recovering from the previous day’s trip to NYC with one of my best friends Aisie. She arrived at my house Sunday evening (as we planned to depart early Monday morning); I baked tahini and walnut chocolate chip cookies (adapted from this recipe) because nothing says welcome like something warm out of the oven. Sharing cookies at the table, I realized there were perhaps a few too many for us to devour comfortably. So, walking out the door at 5:30 am, I grabbed the bag of cookies and threw them in my tote.

Aforementioned tahini, walnut, and chocolate chip cookies

The cookies made a lovely road-trip snack when crunched for time and unable to stop for breakfast or stuck on the metro. Still, there were too many. The difficulty of dispersing them felt like not wanting to offer a stranger a cookie because that could seem sketchy. Luckily, there were a few strangers with whom I cultivated a brief rapport, and cookie-sharing was a-go.

Someone I shared a cookie with posted it on their social media :)

I’ve always faced varying degrees of social anxiety, so the ability to connect with someone relatively effortlessly feels joyous. If I can cook or bake something and discover opportunities to share with others and potentially brighten their day (if ever so mildly) or open the door to know each other better, this is one of my favorite ways to connect. Is it a bribe for partiality? Perhaps. More so, it feels like a means through which I can connect with a sense of purpose. Instead of feeling a need to be socially impressive, performative, or out of my element, I feel like I can more truly honor and display an intuitive, quiet sweetness. As I previously raised not wanting to offer something to a total stranger, there is still an element of healthily going beyond my comfort zone. Instead of avoiding arising social anxiety, I feel I’m meeting it in the middle. I feel grateful that the simple act of sharing can enable that.

A display of generous and joyful spirit

In a previous post, I mentioned a lady named Patty who attends my pottery class. Every class, she brings baked goods (I’m pretty sure she takes baked goods anywhere she goes), ranging from pumpkin muffins to ginger snaps. The aroma of what she’s baked fills the studio as most indulge in her delicious treats. In yesterday’s class, she said the ginger snap recipe she followed made nearly six dozen cookies, to which another student replied something about freezing them for later. I was astonished when Patty responded that she didn’t have any left. I am incredibly impressed that this woman has successfully dispersed around 72 cookies this week alone. If I had to share 72 cookies, I’d desperately end up feeding them to the horses. Patty’s spirit inspires me. For example, she wanted to invite me to share Thanksgiving with her family when she found out I didn’t have any noteworthy plans, despite only knowing me for a few weeks and sharing a handful of brief conversations. Further, last week Patty gave me her extra copy of The Tassajara Bread Book by Ed Browne after we shared a conversation about the peacefulness of baking bread. Being around Patty’s generosity and joy once a week is a gift. While the spirit she encaptures could be identified as holiday spirit, I believe it persists for Patty year long. This seeming holiday spirit seems more so her lifestyle. 

Honestly, I’m a bit stumped as to how to reciprocate Patty’s kindness and demonstrate my appreciation of the generous spirit she embodies. Usually, I’d bake something, but I think she’s got that covered! Perhaps I’ll bring some nice coffee and tea to next week’s class (if you have any other ideas please comment them below).

A song for the season (or year)

For those who enjoy holiday music, feel free to continue reading. Here’s a song of Dolly Parton’s for you to enjoy this holiday season. To be honest, it’s not my favorite of Christmas songs, but I really love the lyrics. They are copy and pasted below if you’d prefer to read it like a poem than endure a pop-style Dolly Parton and Miley Cyrus song.

Christmas Is- Dolly Parton

Christmas is a time for caring
Being at your best
Christmas is a time for sharing
Knowing you've been blessed
Christmas is a time for giving
Love is made of this
That's what Christmas is

Christmas is a joyful time
If you're the lucky ones
Some are blessed with gifts and trinkets
Others having none
Some have feasts up on the table
Others having crumbs
There are the haves and the have nots
And you could be either one

It's all about kindness
Love and compassion
Better to give than receive
That is a true fact
But those who don't know that
Well, they are the poorest indeed
And I hope you remember every December
That bright shining light from above
The promise from God's lips
The greatest of all gifts
Wrapped up in His wonderous love (His wondrous love)
So rejoice in His glory
The great Christmas story
And to all that you're sharing in will (uh huh)
You go tell it with passion (oh)
Of love everlasting (lasting)
'Cause that's what Christmas is

Is a time for caring
Being at your best
Christmas is a time for sharing
Knowing you've been blessed
Christmas is a time for giving
Love is made of this
That's what Christmas is